Decisions
by ciaosushi
Summary: Takes place post season three, when Tony has returned from jail. Michelle notices he isn't himself, and it forces her to make some big decisions. COMPLETED. T for swearing in later chapters.
1. The Choice

Decisions

_Okay, this is my first fanfic, so don't kill me if it's horrible. This takes place post season three, when Tony has returned from jail. I don't own 24 or it's characters._

Michelle sighed as she drained the remaining alcohol from Tony's Cubs Mug into the sink. It was hard to believe that only one year previously she had seen him leave CTU, and leave her- forever. After Jack had somehow beaten the system and freed Tony from jail, she remembered being so overjoyed at the thought of being with him again without a glass wall separating them. They could be like they used to be: So spontaneous and in love. There was no one in the world but the two of them.

They had fallen for each other remarkably fast. Yet despite what her friends and all of the relationship television shows had advised her, she agreed to marry Tony without a second thought. It didn't worry her how quickly their relationship had fallen into place. The mere idea of always being with him! To eat dinner together every evening, and to go to sleep side by side every night, was more than she could bear. How could something that felt so right not work out? They would be with each other always, maybe have children- grow old together, watch their kids grow up. This, more than anything in the world, felt right to Michelle.

Somehow her expectations were not quite lived up to. Tony seemed distracted the day he was released. In the car ride back to their apartment, it was as if he was not really listening to her, he hardly looked at her. He responded only halfheartedly when she told him how much she loved him and had missed him. It seemed as though there was still a barrier between them. The fiery passion that was once sparked when they were together a year ago seemed to have gone out. Maybe all Tony needed was a few days to adjust back to normal life? After all, Michelle had no idea what he might have seen in the confines of the L.A. prison, as she had never been.

So, she did give him a few days. A few days became a few weeks, which then became months. Not only had Tony permanently distanced himself from Michelle, but he had taken up a new drinking addiction. He was never seen without a beer in hand. No matter what Michelle did, and no matter how she begged him to get help, he merely pushed her away and slammed the door. She could not remember how many times she had cried herself to sleep.

"Why?" she would plead with him. "Why do you need this? Why does this obsession satisfy you more than I can?"

"It takes away the pain," he responded, callously. Michelle never got another answer out of him.

After months of pain, sadness and regret, she had suddenly found herself changing emotion. _How could he do this? Does he not love me anymore? After everything we've been through? _He had gone to jail for her. Why was he acting like he didn't need her, or even want her for that matter? Without warning a white-hot anger took hold of Michelle, and she forcefully threw the mug onto the floor. Realizing what she had done, tears began to form in the corners of her eyes. She held them back. She had cried to much already.

Yet, miraculously, it had not broken. She got a grip on herself, and bent to pick it up.

She could answer none of these frustrating questions. Day after day they pounded at her mind, pleading for a solution that wasn't there. They were supposed to tell each other everything, they had both made a promise. Had Tony not meant what he said in his vows? She shook this idea out of her head. He had certainly meant what he said, at least, he had then. What had changed?

She was sure that if they just talked about it, he would return to the normal, loving Tony who had cared about her enough to put her life over the rest of the world. Still, no matter how Michelle had tried to open him up, he was only pushed farther away from her.

Michelle wasn't sure how much longer she would be able to last. Every step became more painful. But what was she supposed to do? Divorce him? Of course not. She couldn't do that to him. It wasn't an option.

She racked her brain for another solution: anything to ease her suffering. Nothing came. There must be a way to repair their damaged relationship. And then it hit her so suddenly the wind was knocked out of her body. Her face went icy, she felt as if all joy had gone from the world. It was the only way for them both to be happy again.

She glanced over at Tony, sprawled on the couch, openmouthed and drooling. She decided to tell him when he awoke.


	2. The Reaction

Decisions: chp. two

Tony awoke with an earsplitting headache inside his temple. _Must have gone a little too far last night, _he figured. Tony looked down at himself. He was certainly a sight to see. All around him lay the residue of not leaving the living room couch for days. Empty beer bottles, Chinese food remains, dirty shirts. The whole area smelled of something unidentifiable- possibly rotten milk? Why hadn't Michelle cleaned this up yet?

Tony massaged the sides of his head, trying to remember what had happened last night. Michelle had tried to tell him something. He couldn't remember what, but it had sounded important. But who was she to interrupt him in the middle of the Cub's game? She should know better.

The agony. It felt as if his head was going to crack open. But it was worth it, physical pain is temporary, and emotional is… well, not. So he had gotten addicted to an emotional pain reliever: alcohol. Drinking was the only thing that made him feel truly numb inside. It pushed all the horrific memories of his time in jail into the back of his mind- where they couldn't surface. It was bliss, not ever really thinking.

The aftermath of the alcohol was beginning to wear off. He could feel again. _Don't think about it, _Tony firmly reminded himself.

_What time is it? _He glanced at his watch. 10am. He supposed there was nothing wrong with a beer in the morning.

"Michelle! Are we out of beer?" His voice rang through the house, but no reply came.

"Michelle?" he called again, but still no answer. _Dammit, she always makes me do things for myself. I deserve a break, don't I?_

He paused for a few minutes, still waiting.

"I'm here, Tony," she sighed in that calm, delicate voice of hers, appearing from behind the kitchen door.

"Can ya get me another beer? In the mug, ya know-"

"Yes, Tony, the Cubs mug."

Nothing happened. A moment passed, it appeared as if she was thinking about something. Maybe what she was thinking about what she had tried to tell him before? Or maybe she already did tell him. He had been too wasted to really care.

"Well, are you going?" he demanded.

"Actually, before you start drinking again, I think we need to talk about something. You know, while you're brain can still register what I'm saying." Her voice was cold, empty- Void of any emotion. This more than anything, scared him.

So what else could he do but evade it in the first place?

"Listen, ahh… I really don't want to talk about this. Why don't you go read or something," he shot back at her, cruelly, switching on the TV to a re-run of The Sopranos.

Clearly these words, more than anything, stung her directly in the heart. It gave him enormous satisfaction to know how much he was hurting her.

Tears began to roll thick and fast from the corners of her eyes. The same eyes that Tony had once called beautiful.

"Tony please…" She pleaded with him, her tears more frequent now, streaking her cold, pale face.

"No. I just want to get a beer."

"Tony! Just hear me out!" she choked through her sobs. "Just… a minute of your time."

He just couldn't see why she was so upset. Was it that hard to go into the kitchen and grab something for him?

"Michelle! Stop crying and help me out, will ya?"

"NO. I won't!" Her tears suddenly stopped. She looked him directly in the eye, with a piercing gaze he had never seen in her before. Hatred.

He just sat there, shocked, waiting for her to continue.

"I was _going _to talk this through reasonably with you, to help me make my decision. But you Tony… You just helped me make it." She paused, turning away from him, taking a deep breath.

"I'm leaving you Tony."

There it was. She said it. It was over. She was going. No.

"Don't be _ridiculous, _Michelle."

"Ridiculous? You think I'm being RIDICULOUS? I can't believe you, Tony. How could I _ever_ have loved you? All you do is hang around on that couch all day, ordering me to get you another beer? Do you have any respect for me? NO. You _don't_," she continued, while feverishly packing her things, "Ever since you came back from prison, you've been different. But I've _tried_ to give you a chance to come around. And then I gave you another chance, and another. Your chances are up. You've neglected me, Tony. It's over. And I'm _NOT_ sorry," she concluded, heading for the front door.

"Who was it who saved your life?" he bellowed, leaving the couch and following her. "Who put your well-being over the lives of all the people in America? _I DID_. And you thank me by _leaving _me?"

For a few minutes she just looked at him. Then finally, she replied.

"The man who saved me has long since gone away. Drowned in alcohol."

With that she grabbed her suitcase, and slammed the door in his face, leaving him to contemplate what she had just said.

_(A/N: Yes, there will be more chapters. I will go into both of their reactions to the divorce. Perhaps they run into each other one day? We'll see. R&R please!)_


	3. The Aftermath

Decisions: chp. three

Michelle slammed the door in Tony's face, but not before catching a glimpse of his stunned expression. How could she have said those awful things about him? She _did_ love him. It was all lies. Her pride alone kept her from whipping open the door and throwing herself into his arms, begging forgiveness. It took all of her strength to walk away from the apartment. _Their _apartment. It felt as if she was walking away from another life- a life with the only person she'd ever loved and ever would love.

_No_, she reminded herself, climbing into her car. This is the only way they could both be happy again. Or at least, she would be happy again. Who knows if Tony ever would get over his drinking? He might end up becoming one of those guys who hangs around bars their whole life and picks up a new woman every night. Michelle couldn't bear to think of Tony in this light. She pushed the thought out of her mind.

She would find someone else, and eventually, gradually, get over Tony. Michelle had to admit to herself that it would probably be the most difficult thing she would ever have to do. The idea of a new man was not only scary, but also repulsing. She wasn't ready, and wouldn't be ready for a long time. Many months would pass of drowning in ice cream, chocolate bars, and soap operas. That, she realized, was inevitable.

For the time being she decided she didn't want to think about her bleak future that didn't include Tony. _If I pretend there's no pain, there won't be. _This was generally how she dealt with things. Nevertheless, she couldn't help reliving their many romantic dinners and passionate nights they had shared. _Stop it. You are only making this worse for yourself. _But telling herself to stop seemed to have made the pain more real. He was gone.

Michelle collapsed onto the driving wheel of her car in desperate sobs. It was really over.

After what seemed like an hour of crying hysterically in her car, her tears subsided. She brushed them away with the back of her hand, and looked at herself in the car mirror.

Michelle hardly recognized herself. Her eyes were red and puffy, her cheeks dripping salty tears. Yet it seemed she was finally in a condition to drive, seeing as she could now actually see through the red puffy slits that were once eyes. But where was she going to go? A friend's?

After a moment of consideration, Michelle decided on renting a hotel room. She didn't think she couldn't stand any company at the time. It seemed unfair to force her damaged self on a friend. She drove to the nearest hotel, a hotel she and Tony had once spent a weekend in, and parked. Good thing she had enough money to spend as much time there as she needed. She pushed through the glass doors and booked a room on the seventh floor.

Michelle wasn't exactly sure why she wanted to stay here. She knew it would only remind her of that romantic weekend they spent together. They had never left their room.

She slid the key card through the slot in the doorway, revealing a beautiful sunlit room with a double bed, dresser, closet, and bathroom. She collapsed on the bed, as too many memories flashed before her.

_Tony pulled Michelle by the hand and threw open the door to their newly booked hotel room. Without warning he scooped her up into his arms, causing her to squeal delightedly._

_"How long are we staying here?" she choked out through uncontrollable giggling._

_"As long as you want," he smiled seductively, bringing her into their brightly lit room._

_"Just what are you implying, Mr. Almeida…?" She looked up at him expectantly, still playfully struggling in his arms._

_"Oh…Nothing in particular." At these words he tossed her onto the bed and pinned her with his strong arms._

_Her laughter immediately died, and she gazed up at him, in awe of the power Tony had over her. He could have done anything to her just then, and she would have obliged without a second thought. This was the strength of her love for him._

_He leaned over and kissed her passionately, then pulled away and slid into the sheets beside her._

_"Let's see what's on TV," he said simply, while pulling out a remote from the bedside table._

_"YOU LITTLE-"_

_She was interrupted by a fierce tickling battle initiated by Tony._

Michelle curled up in the striped sheets in her hotel bed, this fond memory stung her more then she could have ever imagined. She turned on the TV and switched to the nearest Soap Opera channel, vaguely wondering how much of this pain she was capable of enduring.

_(A/N: Sorry, that was kind of short. I'll make sure the next chapter is longer. And just in case you weren't aware, the long italicized portion was a flashback.)_


	4. The Truth

Decisions: chp. four

Tony's initial reaction was shock- and anger. Michelle didn't understand him at all. Who was she to judge him and yell at him? She didn't see what he had seen. She wouldn't have dealt with nearly as well as he had if it had been her returning home from a jail full of criminals. It wasn't up to her to decide how many chances he had.

After a minute or two of fuming and cursing under his breath at the doorstep where Michelle no longer stood, he strolled into the kitchen for a beer and took refuge on his trusty plush couch. Alcohol brought him much more comfort then Michelle ever had. _Good riddance_, he told himself, unaware that he didn't really believe what he was thinking.

He downed a swig of Milwaukee's Best Light and leaned back. He tilted the bottle up to his mouth for another, but stopped himself midway. It was nice to think clearly once in a while. A relief. His headache had mostly died down.

But the moment of clarity in Tony's mind soon revealed to him the devastation of what had just happened. He suddenly realized just how much impact her words had on him. He had been so caught up in blaming her for everything, that he hadn't quite registered what 'leaving' actually meant. Surely not…

Slowly he went over everything she had said in his mind. Then he remembered.

_She doesn't love me anymore…_

_She doesn't love me anymore._

_She doesn't love me anymore._

_No. It can't be true. _But then he recalled the hatred in her eyes as she blamed him only a few moments ago. It had to be true.

_Well, you've been telling yourself the same thing all along, haven't you? That you don't love her either? You _wanted _a divorce!_

In his heart Tony knew he had been telling himself this for a while now. She didn't understand him, so how could he love her?

He reminded himself that she had tried. Michelle had spent months after he'd returned asking him daily to tell him what he had seen. She had pleaded for him to talk it over. But, in his drunken state, he had decided she didn't deserve to know, therefore he had never told her. It pleased him to see her beg.

After a while she stopped begging, and merely did what he asked. They hardly ever spoke, and that was just fine with him. Every night they still slept on the same bed, and occasionally at night he heard a small sob next to him under the covers. He never thought anything of it.

Tony felt disgusted with himself. _How could I have let her go? I love her. I DO love her!_ But _she_ no longer loved _him_. So that was that. It was all his fault. There was no fixing this. He fucked up. It was over.

Now he was just going to be a depressed, unemployed, divorced drunk. Unlikely he would get a job back at CTU. Unlikely he would ever want one. The place was too full of memories. Happy, devastating, romantic… Even the good memories would only be painful. They would just remind him of everything he'd lost and couldn't ever get back.

In only a matter of minutes Tony realized how he had destroyed everything- His job, his relationship, his self-esteem… If only he had realized this a few days ago, or maybe even hours. He could have made up with Michelle, apologized. They would have led a happy life together. It was amazing what a couple of minutes of thinking clearly could do.

He had lost what made his life worth living. So what was the point of turning himself around? He had nothing, no one, to turn himself around _for._

Well, there was Jack- who had, after all, gotten him out of jail earlier than expected. Didn't he owe Jack something?

They were good friends, but only because of what they had been through at work. They had never gotten together outside of CTU.

There _were_ rumors that Jack was a nature-boy at heart. They could go fishing? Nahh... It was too sentimental for two people who hadn't spoken in well over a year. How weird would it be to call him up, out of the blue? He imagined the spectacle…

Tony: Uhh… Hey Jack, it's me, Tony.

Jack: Oh hey, what's going on? Haven't seen you for a while.

Tony: Yeah, I guess not. Ermm… Look, I was wondering. Do you want to… get together sometime?

Jack: umm… Like, on a date?

-Awkward silence-

Tony: No, no! That's not what I meant! I mean like, going fishing or something.

Jack: _Who told you I like fishing_?

Tony: No one! No one, honestly! I just thought it would be nice…

Jack: Well, okay, but I'm not sure why I'm doing this.

Tony chuckled in spite of himself. That was certainly not going to happen.

His momentary humor evaporated as quickly as it had come. There really was no one to improve himself for. His family? He hardly saw them at all. He made a mental list of his friends. Most of them were work friends, and the others were guys he went to college with that he hadn't spoken to in years. There was no one!

He then came to the conclusion that the people who work at CTU make many sacrifices, as he had made. It limited contact with his family, and it was hard to make friends outside of work. But the question was- Were these sacrifices worth it?

Tony had thought they were. There was nothing like the exhilarating feeling of having a mission. A purpose. A reason to live.

But now… He had lost it all. And all because of his job! _My fucking job!_ It wasn't worth it anymore. He felt sorry for those people at CTU who didn't realize that yet. He had been one of them. They were so ignorant, believing that they were making a difference in the world, when really they were just a small pawn in the government system.

And Jack! He had saved millions of lives time and time again. What did he get? A pat on the back, and a small yearly paycheck. No bonus, no nothing. The people at CTU had no idea that they had everything to lose and nothing to gain.

He couldn't quite believe that he was thinking what he was thinking, but at the same time he knew it was true. They were going to lose everything and everyone important in their lives. _Just like I did._

_(A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed- It really keeps me going!)_


	5. The Call

Decisions: chp. five

Eventually Michelle had fallen asleep with _Days of Our Lives_ blaring loudly from the television. Her dreams were disturbed by images of Tony popping up in strange places. She'd be swimming in a deep ocean among the fish, and the head of a sea horse would suddenly transform into the head of Tony, who said things like "I love you Michelle…" "Don't leave me, Michelle…" "We can work this out…"

These dreams were slightly odd, but they continually tightened the ever growing and expanding knot in her stomach.

She awoke with a jolt at 11pm, her cheeks soaked from crying in her sleep. How long had she been out?

_Shit, now my sleep schedule is going to be all messed up_. It was strange how something so small like that still mattered to her. _It shouldn't matter, _she reminded herself. _The only thing you _should_ be guilty about is Tony, and what you did to him._ She reached to wipe away the wet on her face, but stopped herself. _You don't deserve to wipe it away, you ungrateful little-_

These harsh thoughts provoked a fresh wave of tears. How long could she stand this endless parade of guilt? She knew it was her fault. She was all wrong about everything. She should have given him another chance.

But it wasn't as easy as calling him up and begging forgiveness. Michelle wasn't foolish enough to pretend he would ever take her back. He was probably already with another woman, completely forgotten about her. She was certain that if she called, he wouldn't even recognize her voice.

A week passed in her hotel room on the seventh floor, and her train of thoughts never varied. She scanned the room. It was a mess. She had never been so disorganized in her life. There were lots of "advice for women" type magazines strewn across the bed and on the floor. Half-eaten room service food lay on every surface. She hadn't had much of an appetite. _You have really let yourself go,_ she announced inwardly.

Michelle had endlessly debated whether to call him or not.

_He won't take you back! He won't even speak to you!_

_**I'm sure he would if I-**_

_He'll just hang up!_

_**It's worth a try-**_

_It's a waste of time!_

_**I've got nothing to lose; the worst that can happen is he'll hang up.**_

This argument won over the others, and she eventually decided it was worth a shot. She couldn't imagine being more hurt than she was now. She glanced over at the phone. It was across the room. She would have to get up.

_I guess it's about time_. She unpeeled herself from the sheets, and looked down at her body. The same pajamas- she had never changed. She was disgusted. It was almost as if she was back in her own self again. She immediately rushed into the shower- Mostly because she felt gross… but also because she wanted to delay the phone call she knew she would never rest until she made.

Michelle let the rushing water seep all around her body. She liked to pretend it was washing away all of her problems and fears. With every drop that spilled on her body, a small knot was untied in the large mass within her gut.

Temporary relief: Just like alcohol, only hygienic and healthy instead of self-damaging and disgusting. She laughed a little at the thought of an addiction to showers. It was the first humor she had experienced in weeks.

Then she realized that that wasn't possible anyway, because the hotel would send her a gigantic check to pay for all of the water she'd used.

Deciding that she could put it off no longer, she turned the knob and stepped out of the warm, moist stall and wrapped a towel around herself, drying inefficiently. Back in her bedroom, she gazed at the telephone innocently resting on the dresser. _Do I really want to do this?_

She walked slowly towards the phone. With every step the knot became more tied. Her hand trembled as it found the phone and lifted it to her ear. She dialed the number.

One ring. Two rings. Three rings.

"Hello?"

_Oh my God…He actually answered. What do I do? What do I say?_

She was lost in a whirlwind of thoughts. How could she not have thought about what she was going to say?

"Hi," she said softly.

"Who's this?"

_He didn't recognize me. _A fresh tear seeped from the corner of an eye.

"I…"

"Michelle! Oh God, I didn't think you'd ever call. Look, it's uhh… not a good time right now. When can I call you back? I'm so glad you called."

It was too late. She vaguely, yet distinctly heard a woman's voice in the background.

"Is that…a woman?"

"Don't hang up Michelle! She's just-"

Silence. She hadn't hung up, but still could not find words to articulate just what was going through her mind.

"Are you there?" he pleaded with her, sounding desperate.

Suddenly her throat unfroze.

"You've broken my heart, Tony." With that, she hung up the phone and collapsed onto the bed, shaking uncontrollably, her face pale as a ghost.

She couldn't believe she had felt so guilty only a minute ago for leaving a man like that.

_(A/N: Don't worry, some good things are going to happen soon, I'll try to keep it from getting too depressing. Thanks again for the reviews!)_


	6. The Call II

Decisions: chp. six

Tony had given up on Michelle. He knew he would never speak to her again, unless they were forced to. He knew that if he ever got a chance to apologize to her, he would break down in happiness and relief. He wouldn't even care if she didn't take him back, as long as she knew that he was going to change; As long as some guilt was lifted off his shoulders.

He opened his eyes from a long, restless sleep and blinked. The light streamed into the windows and pierced him directly in the eye. What did he do the night before? He had gone to a bar... He had gotten pretty wasted… and a woman? _Oh shit. _There couldn't have been a woman…

Tony turned on his side, and the sight of a girl he had never seen before caused him to shriek and jump from the bed. He looked down at himself. _No clothes…We didn't..._

The woman stirred, and lazily opened her eyes. He dove for the nearest sheet and forcefully covered himself. _Oh God, Oh God…_

"Hey Tony…"

_I am a horrible person. What if I mean something to this girl? And to dump her directly the morning after? _He couldn't do that.

He decided it would just have to last a day or two, and then he would gently break up with her. He didn't have much of a choice.

He rubbed his eyes, trying to pretend it hadn't happened. Maybe when he looked again, she wouldn't be there! He felt a flutter of hope in his chest, but it was quickly replaced with a sinking sensation when he removed his hands from his face to reveal her confused expression.

"Oh…Hey…_You_," he forced himself to spit out, disgusted that he didn't recall her actual name.

To his shock and horror, she moved in for a kiss. Tony had never felt so repulsed by someone in his entire life. Reluctantly, he returned the peck half-heartedly and immediately turned away to wipe the lipstick off.

"So, what do you want to do today? I'm starving," she cooed, overly pronouncing each syllable in an annoying, you're-to-dumb-to-understand kind of way. Then again, maybe it was the aftermath of alcohol.

"Uhhh-" Luckily he was saved the trouble of responding when the phone rang. "Hello?"

There was a long silence. _Some stupid kid prank caller…_ He moved to hang up, when a small voice finally answered.

"Hi,"

It sounded like…_No. It couldn't be her. There's no way_._ Why would she ever call?_

"Who's this?" He ventured, just to be sure.

"I…" the voice trailed off, softly, but he knew that voice anywhere. It _was_ her. Relief rushed through his veins. She hadn't given up!

Then panic struck him. The woman was still there. He couldn't talk to Michelle now, not with this mysterious person in his bed.

"Michelle! Oh God, I didn't think you'd ever call. Look, it's uhh… not a good time right now. When can I call you back? I'm so glad you called."

"Honey, who's that? I'm hungry, let's get something for breakfast," mystery-girl lazily droned in the background. _What if Michelle had heard that…?_

"Is that…a woman?"

_No._ The worst had happened. This stupid person in his bed ruined his only chance of apologizing!

"Don't hang up Michelle! She's just-"

He waited for a response. What if she had hung up? He wouldn't blame her.

"Are you there?"

Finally, he received a reply.

"You've broken my heart, Tony." The line went dead.

In a state of monstrous disappointment, he hung up the phone, defeated.

"Who the hell was that? Another _woman?_" Mystery-Girl seemed to gather the worst from the look on Tony's face. "Damn it! How could you do this?" She threw her clothes on and slammed the door.

Tony found he wasn't in the least bit sorry to see her go. He couldn't believe he had wasted his only chance to talk to Michelle.

He could call her back… But her cell phone would have his name show up on the caller ID. She wouldn't answer when she saw it was him.

Maybe he could try to find her. Go to the places she might have gone. But she was probably at a friend's. He had no idea where her friends lived.

He gave up on trying to contact her, knowing that if she did not want to be found, he wouldn't find her.

Tony glanced around their apartment. Well, now it's just his. This thought depressed him immensely. He couldn't bear to be in this space if Michelle wasn't in it with him. He had to leave.

He ran out to his car. _Where will I go? _A hotel. The thought made sense. No one to bother him there. _What hotel? _He didn't have to think about this much. He knew the perfect place.

Pulling out of the driveway, he smiled. Finally he would have some peace where he could remember the happy times with his wife.

_(A/N: I bet you can guess what hotel… hehe. I'll have the next one up in a few days.) _


	7. The Best

Decisions: chp. seven

Life hadn't improved much for Michelle since the call. For a while she had been angry at Tony, resisting the temptation to tear her hotel room apart in agony. But as she shouted and cursed and ripped random pieces of paper, her real feelings dawned on her. No matter how little she wanted to admit it, she still loved Tony. She always would. There would be no one else. The time they had spent together was easily the best year and a half of her life.

How could anyone replace him? _I will never love again. Simple as that. I'll have to deal._

Michelle felt as if a piece of her was missing. She clutched her hand to her chest over the place where she knew there was a gaping hole in her heart.

She tried to accept the fact that these feelings would never completely go away. But what about Tony? Had he already moved on?

_He has,_ a voice in her head assured. _You heard the woman in the background, don't kid yourself._

But what if it was just a one time thing? A mistake. That had to be it. He couldn't have just forgotten about her in a matter of weeks, that wasn't the Tony she knew. He had told her he loved her many times; told her she was beautiful. He had meant it. Michelle felt sure of this. Still, she couldn't ignore the doubt that now shook all of her wonderful memories with him. Had they been lies?

Was it possible that she was really that blind?

_No. I know there was something there! Don't be stupid! Something changed._ _He wouldn't have married me otherwise._

She felt the hole in her heart widen a little at the thought that he had never told her what happened during his time in jail. He thought that she wouldn't understand.

Michelle recalled their numerous arguments that consistently ended with Tony slamming the door with a cold remark, leaving her in tears.

This fierce debate continued in her mind. Had he forgotten her?

_He loves me, he loves me not. He regrets me, he regrets me not._

This would never be solved if she didn't do something about it. Her life was in her control. She could let the rest of her days waste away along with the memory of her husband, or she could find the truth and try to move on.

_BUT HOW?_

"Please, just give me a sign!" her booming, desperate voice sounded through her room, "A sign is all I need! Does he still love me or want me at all?"

Right at that exact moment Tony Almeida himself burst through her hotel room door that she had left open a small crack.

For a minute they just stood there, mouths open, staring at each other- Both shocked for different reasons. Then everything went dark.

"Michelle… Michelle? Wake up, you fainted," a soft, comforting voice rang through her ears, and her eyes opened lazily.

"Tony…?"

"Yes, I'm here, it's me. I'm sorry, 'Chelle. I'm so, so sorry."

Everything that had happened flowed back through her mind. She noticed she was on the bed, with her husband and only love in the world sitting right beside her.

"How did you know I was here?"

"Oh, I was looking for my room, and I heard your voice. I'd recognize it anywhere," he consoled, warmly.

"Why did you do this, Tony, why?"

"She was nothing. I… had a little too much alcohol," he looked ashamed, "and I woke up next to this woman I didn't know. I didn't even remember her name."

"Why couldn't you have just told me what happened… you know, during your time away?"

"You wouldn't understand. Stuff happened in there that changed me. Changed everything."

"I can try. Help me understand. We are supposed to tell each other everything."

"I… can't. I'm sorry."

"If you love me, you'll do this for me."

A long, heavy silence hung in the air between them.

"If you can't trust me, then… this isn't going to work," she said, softly but truthfully.

"I know, I know."

"Well…"

"I can't."

She had known that this would be his answer, but it ripped her heart in half to hear it voiced.

"I just… I don't know if I can live without you."

"We're going to have to try. It's for the best."

"The best."

Their eyes connected for an endless, intense moment. Then he abruptly broke away.

"Goodbye, 'Chelle."

"Bye."

She watched him leave as if in slow motion. And as the door closed behind Tony, her only love, Michelle couldn't help but wonder if it really was for the best.

_(A/N: Well, that was the last one. Hope you all enjoyed it. I'm really sorry it took me so long to get this up, I got a little bit distracted with another fic. Heh. And I guess I kind of lost interest after what happened to these characters…Well, you know if you are watching the current season of 24. Which sucks, by the way. Anyhow, thanks so much for reading this! Please check out my other fanfic, if you like Harry Potter.)_


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